Let's talk about Toothpaste

 Maybe not a subject that springs to mind pondering about life but...

Being a woman I always squeeze my toothpaste down the tube from top to bottom. It is a man's 'privilege' to squeeze in the middle, isn't it.
And I keep squeezing until the last little bit, I am thrifty. I prefer to have at least one tube in stock but sometimes forget to buy it. So, what happens next is that the amount of paste comes to a point of which I think I am going to run out of it. And I do not live close to a shop.

But here is the amazing thing that when I think I am going to be short of paste, the tube seems to be endless and I always survive until the my next shopping weekend. Not that I count on this every time though. I like to be prepared, I prefer a fresh breath.

Prepared.... I learned throughout my life that being prepared for tomorrow, next week, next month is impossible. Today can be totally different from yesterday or tomorrow. Living life by the day is much more my way (with my little home as my resting point). A 'skill' taught by my parents who regularly moved house because my father found an other job when the current one bored him, he needed challenges.
His career ended at the age of 43 when he got ill but in a way surviving was also a challenge to him.
My mother, a woman with a heart big enough for everyone who needed her unconditional love, managed to create a warm and welcoming home in every house we lived in. One of her favourite quotes was: 'Remember you always take yourself with you. If you can create a cosy home in one house, you can also create it in another house'. And she was so right.

Taking yourself with you everywhere you go needs stability in a sense of being comfortable with yourself by knowing you are the base of your life. Your base needs to be solid, you need to be able to trust yourself and move on from there. Take your base to where ever you go.
Of course life is throwing good and bad at you, I simply do not believe there are people who sail through life without high waters, storms or a good thunder now and then.
Just happiness does not exist. And in my humble opinion... how do you recognize simple happiness if you don't know grief? How do you appreciate a beautiful valley if you don't know the hills?
Or a smooth sea without the high waves?

To be honest, a predictable life would bore me to death. When I look back I can not remember one boring day in my life. Lazy days, yes. But even then I adored this laziness. Absorbed it, drank it in, squeezed every lazy minute out of it. And I still do, I still squeeze every little bit out of my lazy days.

Sometimes my head is full, my brains overloaded. Not just a matter of age, I have had this all my life. When this happens I know it is time to switch off, to withdraw to my little Mental Isle.

Because I work from home, my isle is only available in the weekends but if it is there, I make the most of it by switching off my phone and the internet.
My Mental Isles are a mix of doing completely nothing and enjoying the stillness, or walking the dogs, or reading, photography, watching a film.... just being me. Please do not say I am selfish which I am not. No, in this way I maintain my base. Each base needs maintenance to bear the structure. My structure is always in good use, busy at times. And because life is not predictable, the base needs to be ready for tomorrow.

Would I be an easy person to live with? Probably not, I need my freedom.

Photo: Ike Roelfsema

I am not a moody person, nor angry. Often called 'down to earth but with a good sense of humour' is more who I am. When things go wrong in life, I adapt to the challenge to use the changes to find other paths to my future. These paths always have side paths and sometimes you have to walk and walk to find new destinations but they are there! Never give up!

Be like a toothpaste tube. When you face the moment of running out, keep squeezing, you will be surprised how much there is still left. In the meantime 'buy' a new tube, buy a different taste. Be ready for a fresh breath tomorrow, next week, next month. Life is still full of surprises.

My 'tube' is running out for 2020 and I am looking forward to my holiday in my own home. Squeezing the last bits, buying a new taste for 2021. I am ready for new challenges.

Wishing you all a comfortable Christmas, squeeze the COVID restrictions, don't leave left overs in your old tube. I am looking forward to see you next year.

Lots of love,

Helen XXX

Beautiful things in life

So many beautiful things came my way last week! All done by the beautiful people in my life!

But let me start two weeks ago when I had a little accident. I am not going into details of how it happened, only the results: a dislocated collarbone (believe me, it hurts!!), concussion (yes, I have been 'off this world' as we say here), a bruised knee, fingers and face.

When it happened, my youngest dog was worried sick and tried to get me back on my feet. Even after two weeks I can't go anywhere or he walks or sits next to me, observing me with his beautiful brown eyes. He was the first beautiful 'thing'.
Next was a dear friend who told me the next morning: "If you don't phone your doctor, I will!!!" (knowing my stubbornness so well).

The third beautiful was my doctor who diagnosed what I mentioned above after a thorough examination including an ECG (which proved a healthy heart). He also removed a piece of suspicious tissue from under my eye but when the result came back from the pathologist, it was innocent. This was the 4th beautiful.

I had to postpone a meeting because driving a car with a dislocated collarbone is not only painful but dangerous as well; I can't take action if something is happening.
And from that moment on, the other beautiful things happened and beautiful people arrived on my doorstep!
My pedicure who is also a friend, took me out for a High Tea; we had a lovely afternoon and the food was more than excellent! Thank you so much Elizabeth, you made my day!!!

Another dear friend who also has the gift to keep my impossible hair in shape, arrived with a box full of goodies to enjoy during Christmas. How lovely and thoughtful is this! Big hug Douwina!!

A dear cousin treated me with an extra to spend to my own idea, thank you Hans!!

Another friend gave me a beautiful lantern with a Christmas decor and little lights "for the darker days". Again a hug from me Tineke!

My lovely neighbour being worried about my accident, gave me the biggest hug in the world and friends further away in kilometres, sent me hugs and kisses.

Photo: Helen Varras

Big beautiful things are not the ones you buy with money. Big beautiful things live in people's hearts and souls. An honest hug is not to value in money, only in love. And love my dear readers, is big, special, absolutely beautiful and ever, ever so precious!!

Thank you beautiful people who created little wonders in my life, you mean so much to me!! Sending you my love and may there lots of little lights shine in your life!

Helen

Let's talk about Instagram

   Instagram, a beautiful medium to share your (photo)hobby's with like minded people around the world.
I joined Insta - or IG - in 2015 with some photo's of my animals but soon learned that posting photo's of all destinations I have visited, was a greater joy.
   An even greater joy was following the people with beautiful photo's of items I am interested in or love to see. And if I like a photo I click the Like button and sometimes leave a positive comment and vice versa.
Like minded people interact and slowly  but surely you 'get to know' people; their sense of humour, their likes and dislikes, their hobby's and sometimes about their loved ones.
Occasionally there is a private chat, also known as DM (Direct Message).

   Friends from way before the digital era, were already on IG or joined so yes, true friends are also IG friends.
The word 'friends' developed into a different meaning thanks to media like Facebook and IG. To me the word friend is still the old fashioned name for someone who is close to you, one you can rely on, who laughs and cries with you. Above all, a friend who respects you. In that respect a friend is a rare phenomenon you have to treasure.  Other people I would like to call acquaintances who of course are also nice people but not so close.
Though the internet reveals feelings in between 'acquaintances' and 'friends' and sometimes it moves on to a real friend in real life and how special is this!

   Back to IG where my private account recently reached 1000 followers and I have to emphasize these are for 95% loyal followers, including the very few from day one and during my photo journey, the others.
My goal has never been to get as many followers as possible. I refuse to download Apps to gain them, I  refuse to buy them. To be honest, I find the followers that follow me just to be followed back, useless. Either they like my photo's or they don't.

    This 'follow to be followed' is lately becoming an issue on IG so I noticed. I ignore them and let them move on, but there are nice and kind people who are fed up (to put it nicely) with accounts of people who only exist expressing themselves through an iPhone, mirror and pumped up muscles, DD breasts or gigantic bums, or to be the focal point in every photo, spoiling the views of mountains, beaches etc. If you are on IG for commercial reasons, fine but leave us who enjoy sharing photo's of a totally different kind, alone.

   The positive side of IG is that I do not receive updates about what who says to who in a post I liked. If you are interested in other people's opinions on a post, return but I very rarely do that.

Photo: Helen Varras

It is thanks to all these beautiful photo's, positive comments, encouraging words and loyalty that I resuscitated my DSRL Camera and renewed my interest in Black & White photography. And not only that, the Urbex people with all their wonderful photo's of abandoned properties, are the base of my stories in 'Helen Varras' Story Book'! A life changing experience!

   When my private account reached the 1000 followers, it was time to express my feelings and to thank the true and loyal followers.
My Urbex account reached in a very short time 600 followers,  big thank you to those too!

   Is IG an addiction? No and it will not happen either. Is the combination of IG and photography an addiction? Well..... eeehhmmm.....
And is the combination of Urbex (Urban Exploration), photography, IG and writing an addiction?
Close... and I have to admit it became a way of life I feel extremely comfortable with!!

Helen

Chic Chac's and hierarchy

The readers of my Dutch and English Blog know I have chicken, 6 in total.
Chicken are known for their 'little' brains but if that means that they are stupid, I strongly disagree. Yes, they are naive at times but not stupid. Well...... most are not. And each chicken has a character of its own, a Chic Chac.

When I moved to this house, there were 8 Java dwarf chicken, funny and friendly animals who got along very well. And of course there was a cockerel to keep the peace in the pen (and garden).
But this was quite a few years ago, and all but one died. The oldest died at the age of 10, I called her 'grandma'.

Serama eggs (photo Helen Varras)

The only one left was 8 at the time and she did very well on her own. Than winter came and although there is a lamp to heat the inner pen, she couldn't cuddle up with friends any more and  I thought it was cruel to leave her on her own and bought her a new friend: a gold feathered Serama dwarf chicken who was laying the odd dwarf egg too.
The Serama is quite a character and was telling the Java that she was the boss from now on. The Java, very friendly, disagreed of course but within a few hours they were friends and got along extremely well.

A few weeks later I was able to buy two Bantams (Dutch dwarf chicken); they look like Pheasant hens and turned out to be dominant. It took more than a few hours before everybody got along peacefully. One of the Bantams took over and became the Alpha chicken and took care of her 'sister' who was the Omega.

Not much later I got two Serama's who were very young but lovely. One black-and-white and one dark brown, almost black. Again there was this struggle for hierarchy and no cockerel to handle it.
Why no cockerel you would ask? You live in the countryside!
True but I have a lovely neighbour who is always willing to help out and I am always welcome in their house, still, he hates the sound of a cockerel and I respect that. And... my youngest dog is interfering when the chicken quarrel. He runs full speed to the pen and barks. His bark brings a peace where all chicken unanimously agree to. And they are not afraid of the dog, they come to see where the barking is about...

It is 6 months after the first Serama arrived and I love to watch how they get along. The current hierarchy seems to work best. The Java is of course the oldest but not the Alpha, the Bantam still is and her 'sister' still the Omega. But the Java is definitely the smartest of them all. She does not fight and is a close friend to the gold feathered Serama who is definitely the most cheerful one and the best egg layer.
The dark brown Serama is most quiet but very close with the black-and-white who is far most the stupid one in the pen. Very, very sweet, tame and social but indeed stupid (as we say in Holland: 'exceptions confirm the rules').

The best time to observe their hierarchy is in the morning when they get their food and fruit/vegetables.
The Alpha Bantam (please don't joke that all Dutch are dominant.....) steps in the middle of the food bowl and only allows her 'sister' to eat. Just for the show, the black-and-white picks the 'sister' but is immediately told off by the Alpha. The dark brown Serama sits and waits; she is not in a hurry. The gold feathered is rushing around trying to get to the bowl too and occasionally act if she should be the boss.

And the Java??? You won't see her around in the outer pen, she is inside in the night pen where is also a bowl with food and relaxed and not bothered by hierarchy, she eats.
So, no brains??? Ha!

Enjoy a lovely weekend!

Helen.