Let's talk about Dark Skies

 Skies, the Wadden Sea has them in all sorts, sizes and colours. High skies, low skies, hazy or strong.
There is not something like no sky. The sky is everywhere, all around us, like a caring parent, hugging, comforting, embracing, holding.

I love the sky, love the clouds, love rain and wind. And the sky seems to love me, surprises me every day again.
My days always start early and when it is really bad weather, rain pouring down on my roof, I like to stay in bed to listen to the music on my roof tiles. But usually I get up and take my dogs out for a walk along the coast. Not always to their delight but be fair, they do not melt.

My office day is from 8 till 6 with a lunch hour in between. During office days I have set myself the goal of 6 km walking but often exceed this.
Watching and hearing the Wadden waking up is a treat, a gift I treasure close to my heart. The best moments are when the night is fading into the day, even without sunshine.

To you a grey day might look just grey but when you carefully observe, you will also find silver.
Sometimes like polished silver, sometimes like old silver with traces of use, wearing, being loved and treasured. There are so many nuances in layers, feathers or fluffy cottons. Or high mountains.
And near the Wadden Sea, particularly when the tide is low and the clay like a polished mirror, the reflections are breathtaking. Double beauty.

Also breathtaking are the moments  when the sun rises. Her rays colouring the sky, the edges of the clouds. In a warm pink or beautiful gold. Or with pastel veils, chasing the night away.
This transition from night to day is a miracle I happily observe.
And it is not just the sky but also wildlife. Birds wake up, start chatting, perform their first flight, take a bath. The geese are masters in flying and chatting, you can hear them everywhere. And if you are lucky to see a flight of geese which do not chat, you will hear the sound of their wings, like a soft wind rubbing feathers.
Have you ever heard a gaggle (flock) of grazing geese that all of a sudden decides to fly?
It is a deep dark sound, like drums and it is very impressive.

There are so many birds near the Wadden Sea and all add their own joy and sound.
Sometimes I envy them and would like to fly away as well. Join them to unknown horizons. Viewing the world from above. The weightless freedom of being one with the sky.
Instead I dig my boots firmly into the clay and watch, listen and feel.

Feeling nature is something I need. I need to feel the cold, even when my fingers get numb. It means I am alive. I need to feel the wind, the silk raindrops that sometimes mingle with my happy tears.
Taste those drops.
Often I also want to feel the low clouds. I want to stretch my arms to hug them. I ask them to lift me up and carry me in their fluffy arms. Or dance with me during a storm, like a lover, giving me the pleasure of laughing.
Dancing, not only early mornings or evenings. No, dancing through the night. Either pitch black or lit by millions of stars swirling in the dark silent sky.

March is a wonderful month, she delivers quiet days but also storms. Blue days but also rain.
A glorious sunset does not mean a glorious day tomorrow, or vice versa.
March loves to surprise, to tease. She carries the promise of Spring but also the last bits of Winter which she happily passes on to April.

Photo: Ike Roelfsema

I love March, I love clouds but that is not a secret.
The past weeks were busy, more or less chaotic.
I like  my work tremendously, like everything that crosses my path and needs attention but sometimes my head is too occupied, spinning in the small environment called office.
And then I escape to my so beloved Wadden Sea. Not only close to where I live but also close to my heart.
I admit there are times I need a hug, two comfortable arms that just hold me and do not ask.
But they are not available and nature is. And nature never fails to comfort me, to make me happy, smile.

When I feel the cold wind or the warm sun rays, when I hear the birds and the waves, when I taste the rain or snow, when I see the numerous colours, I am so so so thankful.

In my imagination I spread my arms. Not only to hug the clouds but to spread the treasures of nature, hoping the sparkles will lit your world.

Love,

Helen XXX

Let's talk about Toothpaste

 Maybe not a subject that springs to mind pondering about life but...

Being a woman I always squeeze my toothpaste down the tube from top to bottom. It is a man's 'privilege' to squeeze in the middle, isn't it.
And I keep squeezing until the last little bit, I am thrifty. I prefer to have at least one tube in stock but sometimes forget to buy it. So, what happens next is that the amount of paste comes to a point of which I think I am going to run out of it. And I do not live close to a shop.

But here is the amazing thing that when I think I am going to be short of paste, the tube seems to be endless and I always survive until the my next shopping weekend. Not that I count on this every time though. I like to be prepared, I prefer a fresh breath.

Prepared.... I learned throughout my life that being prepared for tomorrow, next week, next month is impossible. Today can be totally different from yesterday or tomorrow. Living life by the day is much more my way (with my little home as my resting point). A 'skill' taught by my parents who regularly moved house because my father found an other job when the current one bored him, he needed challenges.
His career ended at the age of 43 when he got ill but in a way surviving was also a challenge to him.
My mother, a woman with a heart big enough for everyone who needed her unconditional love, managed to create a warm and welcoming home in every house we lived in. One of her favourite quotes was: 'Remember you always take yourself with you. If you can create a cosy home in one house, you can also create it in another house'. And she was so right.

Taking yourself with you everywhere you go needs stability in a sense of being comfortable with yourself by knowing you are the base of your life. Your base needs to be solid, you need to be able to trust yourself and move on from there. Take your base to where ever you go.
Of course life is throwing good and bad at you, I simply do not believe there are people who sail through life without high waters, storms or a good thunder now and then.
Just happiness does not exist. And in my humble opinion... how do you recognize simple happiness if you don't know grief? How do you appreciate a beautiful valley if you don't know the hills?
Or a smooth sea without the high waves?

To be honest, a predictable life would bore me to death. When I look back I can not remember one boring day in my life. Lazy days, yes. But even then I adored this laziness. Absorbed it, drank it in, squeezed every lazy minute out of it. And I still do, I still squeeze every little bit out of my lazy days.

Sometimes my head is full, my brains overloaded. Not just a matter of age, I have had this all my life. When this happens I know it is time to switch off, to withdraw to my little Mental Isle.

Because I work from home, my isle is only available in the weekends but if it is there, I make the most of it by switching off my phone and the internet.
My Mental Isles are a mix of doing completely nothing and enjoying the stillness, or walking the dogs, or reading, photography, watching a film.... just being me. Please do not say I am selfish which I am not. No, in this way I maintain my base. Each base needs maintenance to bear the structure. My structure is always in good use, busy at times. And because life is not predictable, the base needs to be ready for tomorrow.

Would I be an easy person to live with? Probably not, I need my freedom.

Photo: Ike Roelfsema

I am not a moody person, nor angry. Often called 'down to earth but with a good sense of humour' is more who I am. When things go wrong in life, I adapt to the challenge to use the changes to find other paths to my future. These paths always have side paths and sometimes you have to walk and walk to find new destinations but they are there! Never give up!

Be like a toothpaste tube. When you face the moment of running out, keep squeezing, you will be surprised how much there is still left. In the meantime 'buy' a new tube, buy a different taste. Be ready for a fresh breath tomorrow, next week, next month. Life is still full of surprises.

My 'tube' is running out for 2020 and I am looking forward to my holiday in my own home. Squeezing the last bits, buying a new taste for 2021. I am ready for new challenges.

Wishing you all a comfortable Christmas, squeeze the COVID restrictions, don't leave left overs in your old tube. I am looking forward to see you next year.

Lots of love,

Helen XXX